• Who we are
  • Archives
  • Categories
  • Get it?

    2012 - 10.29

    Yesterday I was sparring with a commentator on TGA. He made the point that many people have become too sensitive to others who point out the error of their ways.

    I do not necessarily disagree. Sometimes I think people do need to man-up and lighten up a bit.

    However, he used the example of the news anchor who rec’d a letter from a man who told her that her poor physical condition was a bad role model to young women. (She was fairly overweight.) My reader seemed to think she had overreacted to his constructive criticism.

    Rather than reflecting on this man’s words and then fixing herself, she asked some very pointed questions:

    • Did he think she was unaware that she was overweight and needed him to point this out?
    • Did he think that a woman he admitted he seldom watched on TV would care about his opinion?
    • Is there a particular reason why she should care what he thinks?
    • Did he bother to get to know her, the three daughters she’s raising, and the other aspects of her life?
    • She basically told him to mind his own business and go jump in a lake.

    Back to our discussion.

    I tried to think of a way to explain in my usual acid, sarcastic way that not everyone is all that thrilled with unsolicited advice. Especially when it’s about something extremely personal, such as as whom one shares his life with.

    But that seemed like too much work. So I told him to go ask his fat wife what she thought about the news anchor’s reaction.

    It did not go over well. At all.

    Then to add insult to injury, I suggested she consider losing some weight and gaining some ambition so they could have some nicer things in life. Then I insulted her complexion and told her she’d feel better if she did something about it, and that the department stores would offer her free advice.

    And I closed each suggestion with the assurance I was only saying this out of love and had only their best interests at heart.

    Here’s a newsflash: Gay people are real people. With real feelings. And people they love.

    When a naive college student proclaims in the media that the most important relationship in my life is sinful, she needs to be prepared for some heavy push-back coming her way.

    I’m thrilled she has an opinion and the opportunity to share it.

    The reality is what she thinks of my life and my relationship with Ricky doesn’t mean squat to us. And I’m really not interested in reading about it in the newspaper, any more than she’d be interested in reading about why I think she has some unresolved issues with her controlling parents.

    She has every right in the world to live as she chooses, and zero right in the world to force her beliefs into our legal system.

    To head off the obvious coming comments, making gay marriage legal does not mean you will be required to marry someone of the same gender, so knock it off. You actively accessed my blog page, so if you don’t want to hear what I have to say, that is 100% within your control.

    And the bestiality argument is lame, so save it.

    Today’s Gay Agenda: I regret hurting the feelings of the commentator’s wife. And I also hope they got a glimmer of what it feels like to have a complete stranger shout from the rooftops what he thinks of your life and the one you love.

     

    Tags: , , , , , ,

    2 Responses to “Get it?”

    1. Barbara says:

      Knowing you to be a basically kind and good-hearted person, I knew that you’d have regrets about the tone of your previous post. But, you’ve made an excellent point here: gay people have to listen to cruel and hateful comments all the time, on top of being denied basic human civil rights–as if they are not humans at all, but are instead punching bags for those who need to feel superior.
      To those critics who are offended by your tone, I offer this simple fact of life: if you can dish out dirt, you’d better be prepared to get some back.

    2. Sometimes Satisfied says:

      I am so happy to see your new posts. I was getting tired of rereading the old ones. I saw the article with that young woman and her comments about leaving her former college because of the apparant wide acceptance of lgbtq people. It made me sad for her. Life is going to be hard. I work at a university and I can honestly say that on a very regular basis I encounter people whose opinions I do not share and even people whose life choices I would not make even at cost of personal harm. It hasn’t made me chose to leave my job though. I accept that some people make choices I do not agree with. I accept that some people are different from me. In my positon I am frequently forced to evaluate the choices made by others and the impact those choices may have had on their academic success. This often results in a serious internal struggle between what I feel is right and their right to make a choice I don’t agree with. In reading the article yesterday I wonder what this young woman will do now? Will she remain at Concordia and finish her degree? What will she do when it is time for her to go into the workforce? Will she find a place that she can be happy? How will she shelter herself (an her children) from the world? Why did someone not teach her that it is ok to be different? Did she not learn that you can choose not be be friends with someone based on your personal feelings about how they live their lives? Has she not realized that lgbtq is beyond her control? That letting other peoples lifestyle choices control her life is not going to serve her well?
      Ok….this got much longer than I planned. What it comes down to is I am happy to see you are back. I look forward to hearing more about Boca. Also I am happy the holiday season is here so I can be inspired by your entertaining and decorating. Have a safe trip.

    Your Reply